It seems the Young Gentlemen’s movement is gaining some steam. In our Q & A forum we have received questions and queries from Gentlemen-in-Training and the Established-Gentry alike. The most persistent theme being: Being A Gentleman; how do I do it?
A: Keep reading the blog, spread the word, and remember: “Classic is timeless” paired with “Less is More” (and a dash of “substance over brands” is a good start and a mantra to keep with you.
Okay, let’s get to it!
Dear TGG,
I am in a bit of conundrum. I feel somewhat abashed writing to you about this, but hopefully you can offer me some insight… I am an aspiring young gentleman at the age of twenty-three. I think to disclose this fact to my comrades would make me feel somewhat ostracized. It is unfortunate that we live in a society that feels a resentment for those who are concerned about appearance and live the hedonistic lifestyle. How do you think I could practice being a young gentleman without giving off the notion that I am snobbish or dislocated from my peer group? Or do you feel that this challenge that all gentleman today have to face? On that note aside, do you happen to recommend a good reference book that I can follow to improve myself and learn more of the art of being a gentleman.
Sincerely, Aspring Young Gentleman
Answer:
he·don·ism/ˈhēdnˌizəm/Noun
1. The pursuit of pleasure.
2. The ethical theory that pleasure is the highest good and proper aim of human life
WAIT, what’s wrong with that? Nothing.
Some people don’t get it, but it would also be a glaring oversight to not note that many religious dogma carry a footnote on Hedonism: Don’t do it. But, this is silly, the pursuit of pleasure is as unique as the grooves on the tips of our fingers which make up our fingerprints. For Mother Theresa (if I can continue on this tangent) her cause was her hedonism. For others that pursuit may be different in nature but never in aim.
If this is your life’s philosophy, why disclose it at all? This is your life, live it and pursue what is ultimately excellence in everything you do (eat, wear, drive, are a part of, believe etc…)— if genuine (and grounded in substance) people will recognize this. If one’s intentions are not grounded in substance or are false, then such aspirations will come off exactly as that; aspirational, snobbish, and obnoxious.
How we define what it is to be a Young Gentleman answers the second part of your question: is a Young Gentleman A) a male fashionista who indulges in reflecting the world’s runways and indulges in all things Gucci while donning an Hermes belt with a huge “H” on the buckle; B) a ‘dandy’ who walks around in innocuous social situations (at the Café, pub, or relaxing with friends) in monogrammed velvet slippers and owns a collection of pocket squares and cravats which are all worn generously OR C) is a Young Gentleman one who understands that life is a mix of pursuing pleasure and dreams while simultaneously understanding our obligation to the world and those around us never forgetting to indulge in celebrating life’s occasions with the best the world has to offer.
We think a little bit of B and a whole lot of C (we can attest to our Editor-in-Chief’s large collection of custom-made cravattes and his yearning for velvet-slippers). All men who wish to care a little bit more about what they wear and spend a little more time worrying about what they look like will always face certain amount of consternation- this depends largely on what part of the world you live in.
Go to Capri or Napoli in the summer and the endless cascade of pinks, light blues, and faded yellows on men wearing close-fitting pants and cropped jackets will amaze you (all straight macho-men by the way). Try to dress like that in Detroit, Michigan or in Podgorica, Montenegro and you may seem somewhat out of place and ripe for the picking. To be a Gentleman is, yes, to dress… but to dress timelessly, to have a style which is the most understatedly apparent in the details; and those details (all of them) are never forgotten; what’s more those details extend to every corner of your life.
So, Aspiring Young Gentleman, go forth into the world follow your bliss and forget what anyone has to say about it- for your happiness is, ultimately, your own private pleasure.
And remember… Although it may have taken you 45 minutes to get ready a man should never look like he took more than 5 minutes to do so. Anything else comes off as contrived (i.e. trying to hard).
PS- Alejandro’s personal favorite (and we agree with our dear Editor-in-Chief) is GENTLEMAN: A TIMELESS GUIDE TO FASHION (Ullmann) by Bernhard Roetzel which you can find here: http://amzn.to/msprmg
Circa Alejandro 